Lost Identity - Part One

The baby platypus began to construct himself a nest.
He gathered leaves and sticks that he found on the sidewalk. He left the pebbles alone. They wouldn’t be comfy to sleep on.
He knew it was going to get cold soon. The nest would be comfy for when the cold came. With no pebbles.
Very soon, the nest was complete. The platypus patted down a little hole in the nest to lie down in.
His tummy rumbled. He wanted milk. But there wasn’t anyone to give him milk. Not anymore. Not since the two-legged, furless, beakless, tailless animals had come along. Not since the big metaly monster had taken him away from his cave and his rock and his mommy and daddy.
The baby platypus yawned and closed his eyes. It was strange being alone and not cuddled up next to a mommy or a daddy or another baby platypus.
Two-legged animals walked past him on the sidewalk. They all had different kinds of paws. Some of them were black and shiny. Some were white and not shiny. Some had pointies on the backs of their paws.
All of them made very loud noises when they walked.
The baby platypus eventually became used to the noise and started to drift off to sleep.
But then he heard one walking noise that stopped.
“Dad.” Said a voice.
The baby platypus did not understand the voice. It wasn’t speaking in a normal animal call.
That was the thing about the two-legged animals. They had so many different calls for everything that it wasn’t possible to know what they were trying to say.
“Dad, look. There’s a little animal here. It looks like a stray.”
The platypus opened one eye. A small two-legged animal was bent over him. The animal had headfur the color of chocolate milk. The platypus had heard about chocolate milk back home.
Another much larger two-legged animal stopped in front of the platypus. This one had headfur the color of a night sky, as well as mouthfur. “Oh. It’s a platypus. Poor little thing. He looks cold.”
“We have to help him, dad. Can we?”
“Of course we can. Hello, little guy…”
The night sky headfur animal put his paw underneath the platypus. The platypus yelped. He did not want to be taken out of his nest. Not again. Not again.
“It’s all right.” The night sky animal said. “I’m not gonna hurt you.”
The platypus was lifted from his nest. The next thing he knew, the night sky animal was holding him.
Cuddling him.
Just like cuddling back home.
The baby platypus started to feel a little better.
“It’s okay, little guy. Everything’s going to be okay.”

The baby platypus learned quickly.
He learned that the two-legged animals were called humans, and that the night sky human was named Monogram. But sometimes his name was Francis, and sometimes his name was Dad. And the other one was named Monty, but sometimes he was named Son.
It was all very confusing, but the baby platypus was still very happy with what he had learned so far.
Monty was very nice to him. Monty fed him milk and gave him cuddles. Monogram gave him milk, too, and blankets to sleep on. Blankets were another thing the baby platypus learned about. They were completed nests that anyone could use. And they could be over you, not just under you, so that you could be even more warm.
The baby platypus also learned new human words. “House”, for example, meant “cave”.  “Building” meant a house that wasn’t a house. “Food” and “Dinner” meant “milk”. “No” meant “do not bite that”.
Sometimes the baby platypus slept in Monogram’s house, but sometimes Monogram took him and put him in a little box in another building. The box had a glass hole in the front that the baby platypus could look out of. It also had a blanket and a bowl of water and a bowl of food.
The baby platypus liked the box okay, but it wasn’t very fun.

It was the sixth time the baby platypus had been put in the box.
He was beginning to get tired of the box. He didn’t like sitting in it all day. All he could see from the box were fishies swimming in a big glass tank, and humans if they happened to walk past.
The baby platypus took a drink from his water dish. He couldn’t wait until it was nighttime and he could go back to Monogram’s house.
Suddenly the platypus heard a jingly sound. He knew that meant that there would soon be humans coming inside the building.
The platypus started to drink from his water dish again.
When he looked up, he saw two little humans. One had red headfur. The other had green headfur.
“Look, Ferb! That one’s looking at both of us at the same time!” Said the red one.
The platypus chattered.
He liked these humans. They were smiling at him. Humans didn’t ever look at him when he was in the box.
“That thing? You’re kidding, right?” A human with orange headfur said.
The baby platypus continued to watch the red and green humans. They were interesting.
“What would you even name a platypus?” The orange one said.
“Bartholomew.” Said red and green at the same time.
The platypus understood this.
He knew he was a platypus. And he knew what a name was.
He had just been given a name.
He was Bartholomew the platypus. And that made him feel happy.
After a few moments, the nice lady who always gave him water opened up the box and put Bartholomew into a carrier. She handed the carrier to the red human.
“Bye! Enjoy your platypus!” She said.

The humans let Bartholomew out of the carrier once they were at home.
He got out and sniffed the air, then the carpet. It was very soft and fibery.
“Hi Bartholomew! I’m Phineas.” Said the red human. “And that’s my brother Ferb.” He pointed to the green human. “And that’s Linda and Lawrence and Candace.”
Bartholomew chattered. He was happy. He was not in the box. And he was with the nice humans that had looked at him.
“You know what?” Phineas said. “You don’t look like a Bartholomew after all.”
“What does he look like?” Ferb patted Bartholomew on the head.
“I don’t know.”
“Chester? Perry? Alexander?” Ferb suggested.
“That’s it!” Phineas jumped up.
“Alexander?” Ferb repeated.
“No, Perry! Perry’s the perfect name for him. Perry the platypus!”
“Are you sure, boys?” Asked Linda. “The shelter we got him from requires that we tell them his name. We can’t keep changing it.”
“We’re sure!” Phineas said, and Ferb nodded.
So he was Perry now.
Perry the platypus.
Perry crawled into Phineas’s lap. It looked comfy. He lay down.
“Aww, he likes you, Phineas.” Linda said.
Perry did like Phineas. But he also liked Phineas’s pants. They were the color of blueberries.

A month later, Perry had learned many more things, too many to list.
But his favorite thing that he had learned was that Phineas, Ferb, Lawrence, Linda and Candace were his family.
And that their house was also his house forever and ever.
“Catch, Perry!”
Another tennis ball flew out of nowhere and landed next to Perry’s paw. Perry picked it up in his mouth and chewed it. It had a nice texture, a nice rubbery taste… Tennis ball was a lovely food.
Phineas came over and took it out of his mouth. “No, silly, don’t eat it.”
Perry chattered in disappointment.
“Catch, Ferb!” Phineas threw the ball again.
Perry looked over at a creature with a big tail that was sitting up in a tree, glaring at him.
It was a squirrel. Phineas had told him about squirrels once. Perry was proud of himself for remembering the word. Apparently Candace wasn’t fond of squirrels, though.
The squirrel climbed down the tree and chattered at him. “Follow me.”
Perry stayed where he was.
The squirrel looked angry. “Don’t be stubborn. Get over here.”
Perry chattered back. “No. You can smell flowers here.”
“How about impending doom?”
“What does that mean?”
The squirrel sighed and glanced at Phineas and Ferb. “If you come now, we can get into the lair without them noticing.” The squirrel put on a hat. “Come on, Perry.”
Perry didn’t quite understand, but got up anyway and trotted over to the squirrel. The squirrel placed a paw on the tree. A door opened up.
Perry stared at it. Trees weren’t supposed to have doors.
“No time. Get in there!” The squirrel shoved him into the entrance.
Perry fell through a tube and landed in a big room full of gadgets he had never seen before. He didn’t like electronics much. They weren’t fun and chewy. And they didn’t smell like flowers.
“Hello, Agent P. My name is Major Monogram.”
Perry turned to face a man standing in the back of the room. He looked kind of like someone Perry knew once.
“I’m the man who rescued you as a stray.”
Right. This was the man who saved him from that cold sidewalk. His shoes looked yummy.
Monogram placed a hat on Perry’s head. “This is O.W.C.A, the Organization Without a Cool Acronym. And as of today, you are an agent in training. Now, there are a few rules. One, your host family must never, NEVER, find out about your true identity as a secret agent. Two, you must never reveal your identity, even if it is to protect someone. And three, you follow my orders, no matter what.”
Perry wanted him to order him to eat his pants. They were the color of olives.
“Now, you must learn to walk. That’s the first step.” Monogram held out his hand. “Grab onto my hand and stand up.”
Perry chattered.
“Come on, now.”
Perry placed his paw on Monogram’s hand. It felt weird, standing on only three legs. He stretched out his fingers to get a better grasp.
“Now, on two legs.” Monogram lifted his hand slowly, raising Perry on his back feet.
Perry yanked his paw away and placed all four feet firmly on the ground.
Monogram frowned. “Carl, this one isn’t behaving.”
“Maybe he’s scared, sir.” Said a nasally voice from a corner.
“Well, fix it!”
A boy with curly brown hair and purple glasses emerged. “Hiya, Agent P! My name is Carl. See how I’m standing on two legs?”
Perry liked grass. He wondered if there was any around here.
“Pay attention.” Monogram told him.
“Just try to stand on two feet.” Carl said. “Once you balance on two feet, a whole world will open up to you. I promise.”
Perry wondered if that world had grass. Slowly, he lifted his front feet off the ground. He wobbled a bit.
“Steady yourself.” Carl said.
Perry leaned a bit and found he was able to get into a comfortable position on his two legs. But where was the new grass-filled world?
“Perfect!” Carl said. “Once you feel comfy, try taking a step forward. Try walking.”
Perry slowly inched a foot forward. He toppled over. These people were crazy. He was not a human. He had four legs. Not two.
“Come on, Agent P. It’ll be easy once you get the hang of it.” Monogram held out his hand again.
Perry growled. He didn’t want to fall again. Falling was scary.
“We’ll just teach you how to walk. That’ll be it for the day. You can go home. But you have to cooperate, all right?”
Perry frowned. This wasn’t the Monogram he remembered. The Monogram he remembered gave him milk and blankets and cuddles.
He didn’t make Perry fall.
“Come on, Agent P.”
Perry hesitated.
And placed his paw in Monogram’s hand.